Larry never took Steroids to Beat a NYC Parking Ticket

Last Updated on October 26, 2017 by Lawrence Berezin

There are some things I detest more than one unjust NYC parking ticket

Liars, two unjust NYC parking tickets, and crying in baseball.

Unless you live under a rock next to the GEICO guy, you saw a couple of liars on parade yesterday. There was Ryan Braun apologizing if he offended anyone (how about the baseball writers who vote for candidates to the Hall of Fame, and his family?) swallowing a 65 game suspension from baseball, and Carlos Danger (aka Anthony Weiner, wannabe NYC mayor) parading his wife in front of the media so she could tell us all that she forgave her husband’s transgressions.

I suppose if your wife forgives you, then your character, integrity, judgment, and ability to lead is restored. Here is last year’s Ryan Braun speech yelling at baseball.

Larry’s rant: There is no lying when you want me to fight your parking ticket

I’ve met my fair share of scoundrels during the past five years fighting NYC parking tickets. But, the number of NYC drivers behaving badly is growing. I’d like to put a stop to these troglodytes who think I’m going to join their parking ticket gang and help them game the Evil Empire…Well, I’m not.

When you’re right-FIGHT. There is no one who is going to work harder to beat your parking ticket than my partners and I. But, I will not be your co-conspirator. Fuggetaboutit.

I’ve identified three types of parking ticket scoundrels:

• The undercover scoundrel: This person’s got it all figured out. He’ll lie to me, I’ll be fooled, and do the heavy lifting to help him beat his parking ticket.
• The overt miscreant: This guy or Guyette will come right out and say, “I’ve got a phony registration, will you help me beat my parking ticket for expired registration?”
• The sad loser: This person will tell me the truth about what happened, and then when she learns the truth will not set her free, tells me she wants to change her story to fit the defense.

Commentary

I don’t get it. How is a voter’s faith restored in Weiner because his wife forgave him? How do you separate a candidate’s private character, integrity, and leadership from his public character, integrity, and leadership? Does this mean we’re voting for the public Anthony Weiner, and not the private Carlos Danger?

Ryan Braun is a sad tale about a young liar surrounding himself with stupid advisers. I’m thinking he hired the same gang that counseled LeBron to star in the production of “I’m taking my talents to South Beach.”

If you get a parking ticket in New York City and there is no legitimate substantive or technical defense…pay it quietly. Save the fight and bluster for when you’re right.

(PS…Thanks for letting me vent…My next vent is scheduled in five years).